| NOTE: This article was originally published in May | | | | most-anticipated three words: "You've Got Mail!" I |
| 2000 at when my grandmother was alive. I came | | | | feel like the old switchboard operator in a small |
| across the link from my Web site and, after | | | | town, listening to everyone's business. An odd |
| debating whether or not to change anything, | | | | image, that, considering the vast computing |
| decided to leave it. As Jadzia Dax said in STAR | | | | power of the Internet.Or maybe not. After all, |
| TREK: DEEP SPACE NINE, "If you want to know | | | | hackers can get into your AOL or Microsoft |
| who you are, it's important to know who you've | | | | Outlook Inbox and read all about your last fight |
| been." Of course, Edna Mode in THE INCREDIBLES | | | | with your mother, your latest campaign finance |
| SAYS, "I never look back, dahling. It distracts | | | | blunders (you know who you are), that you hate |
| from the now." So I won't look back, i.e. revise, | | | | your boss, or your wild fantasies about Harrison |
| and will present this essay as it originally | | | | Ford. Heck, your company and the government |
| appeared.* * *April 2000"Anyone home?" My | | | | can read the same things, and I guarantee you |
| neighbor Nancy's yellow inner tube enters the | | | | they'll have less fun than the hackers.Voyeurism: |
| house before she does. She holds up her bottle of | | | | the final frontier. I could make a case for The |
| iced tea in silent response to my offer of a cool | | | | Need for Connectedness in this Information |
| drink. No one in 80-degree California desert | | | | Society. After all, E.M. Forster put it best: "Only |
| weather would be without iced tea. Except for | | | | connect." And e-mail is allowing us to reach people |
| me. I still have my fourth cup of coffee in hand, | | | | we wouldn't spend 33 cents, or a nickel a minute |
| waiting to burn my tongue the way the sidewalk | | | | for the latest long distance plan, to talk to. It's |
| outside does bare feet."I'm off to the pool to do | | | | easy, it's convenient, and as my neighbor says, |
| my exercises," Nancy says. "But before I go, do I | | | | "It's fun!" It allows us to feel the thrill of |
| have any messages?"I smile apologetically. "None | | | | anticipation we used to feel when the mail carrier |
| of the grandkids have written."Nancy stands | | | | arrived. But that was before we became adults. |
| there, face puckered in an oddly stoic expression. | | | | The anticipation dulls when you know the mail will |
| "None of them? Didn't they get my | | | | bring the electric bill, a solicitation for the |
| e-mails?""There's no way to tell.""They did before. | | | | Policeman's Ball, or a flyer titled "Have You Seen |
| They wrote me back."I nod. "They're probably | | | | Me? Missing Children." All important, but not |
| just busy." Nancy has at least seven grandchildren | | | | satisfying.Think of writing a letter in ancient times, |
| scattered across North America. One of the girls | | | | the thought in the act of writing. We still enjoy |
| is reportedly backpacking in Europe right now. The | | | | the passionate love letters of Napoleon and |
| rest of them are all in college.She shakes her head | | | | Josephine, Abelard and Heloise. It is a glimpse into |
| slowly. "So much for 'If you had e-mail, we'd write | | | | someone's life we never knew.There is something |
| you more often.'""Do you want to send them | | | | appealing about connecting this woman, who |
| anything?""Nah. I have to go do my exercises." | | | | volunteers for the Red Cross and hesitates to |
| Nancy maneuvers around with the inner tube. She | | | | buy a computer, with her grandkids. I am not just |
| pats me on the shoulder. "Thanks anyway.""I'll | | | | the letter-writer or the secretary. I am part of |
| come get you if there's anything in my mailbox," I | | | | the connection.Days later, still no word from the |
| say before I head back to my home office. | | | | kids. I write them another letter: "Dear Kids, Your |
| Sitting down at my keyboard, I ignore the sun | | | | grandmother needs you! If you're worrying about |
| shining off the palm trees and once again check | | | | her bothering me, don't. Please write to her. Only |
| Outlook Express. E-mail from my mother. Offers | | | | a few minutes of your time and I won't tell your |
| from The e-mail newsletters I tell myself I don't | | | | parents all the things she's told me, things she |
| have time to read.Nothing from Nancy's | | | | would never tell your folks. What can I say, she's |
| grandchildren. I call up their addresses, cut and | | | | an incredible woman."I'm not bluffing. I know how |
| paste them into the TO line, then proceed to | | | | to find their parents. And I think they know I |
| type: "Dear Kids, Your grandmother really wants | | | | know. The next day, I get an answer from one |
| to hear from you. She would be so tickled if you | | | | of the girls: "Dear Kristin, How many things have |
| would write. Stay in school, have fun in Europe, | | | | you done that you didn't want your parents to |
| nurse that ankle (whichever one of you is playing | | | | know about?" (More than she has.) "Get on with |
| football), and keep warm! Love ya, Kristin."I click | | | | your life and let us get on with ours. Some of us |
| Send, and get back to whatever I was doing | | | | have midterms. I don't mean to sound rude. I love |
| before Nancy's visit. Hours later, I'm still checking | | | | my grandmother. |
| my e-mail for Nancy, eager to tell her the new | | | | |