Spending Time With Children

The foundation for building a good relationship withstores, the bus stops, etc.If there is a park near
your children requires that you spend time withby, pack up a paper bag lunch and eat a meal or
them - spending time getting to know who theysnack at the park...and spend some time enjoying
are, getting to sense the clues that seem towhat is available. Take along a book to read to
motivate behavior issues, and getting to graspthe children. Bake up some cookies and take
their humor and interests in life. Every parent hasthem to a senior friend (can be done in the
the potential to build a deep relationship with theirevening or on the weekend). Think building
child that will survive through the teenage years.communityand help a neighbor who needs help
Building this relationship does not require spendingwith weeding, mowing or needs just a visit! Don't
a ton of money. As David Elkind said when heforget to write picture letters to relatives and
was in Portland many years ago, it is not thewalk to the nearest mailbox.So, put away your
fancy trip to Disneyland that bonds your child towallet and think home art! With some paper and
you. The bonding occurs during the day-to-dayglue and odd bits of macaroni you can make
interactions of daily events and seasonal activities.super collages or use some cardboard and make
So, put your wallet away and thinkpicture frames. With some old magazines, create
"home".Encourage children to work with you in thepuzzles - and after you have cut some up, see if
yard! Delight in the nature around you! Discoveryou can assemble them. Possibly glue the pieces
the potato bug and dissect the weed! Yes, it willdown as you do that and create another form of
take longer to do the yard work with the help ofcollage. Take the newspaper and roll the sheets
little fingers, but as you work you will find humorto make long and short poles; then using masking
and create a healthy respect for nature.Encouragetape, build a structure or 3-dimensional art
your children to help you cook. When we havesculpture. Put it outside and see what the
actually cooked something there is such a strongweather does to it! Create wish cards using
sense of accomplishment! Let your children helppictures from catalogs. Create "I feel" or "This is
you prepare the ingredients for cooking - childrenwho I am" cards, using pictures from magazines
are able to chop and sift and peel.Again, it takesand catalogs of all sorts. Not every activity will
longer, but all of it helps with relationhsips. It is notappeal to every child in your family. That is ok.
necessary to have all 5 children in the kitchen atProvide the opportunity to the children who are
the same time; set up a schedule and make it anot interested to be involved in something else
special date time with the parent who is cooking.Ifthat interests them. One-on-one time with each
everybody helps clean up the house, there is achild in a family is as important as spending time
sense of community-building.The key to buildingtogether with all the family! Recognize that
relationships is to be respectful of the individualitychildren are interested in different things depending
of each child.It isn't just mom's duty to keep theupon their age and skill levels. The key to building
environment clean and workable for the family. Irelationships is to be respectful of the individuality
know families who spend Thursday nightsof each child.Sally Skelding has been molding the
housecleaning and then plan fun things to do onminds of both young adults and children for more
the weekend.Allow children to actually shop withthan 30 years. Sally's long career started in
you and help make up the list. If you haveYoungstown, Ohio, where she was the Director
several children, let children trade off participation.of the Youngstown Civic Children's Theatre. During
So, put your wallet away and thinkthose years, she and her students entertained
Neighborhood.With very young children, takechildren with puppetry and children's theatre
walks about your neighborhood, pointing out andperformances. In time, she returned to her roots
discovering the dogs & cats, the flowers, theand moved to the West Coast with her husband.